Friday, November 1, 2013

Finding My Voice

Bird Gardener writes "Finding My Voice" on Take a Left at the Moon. Trigger Warning for forced hospitalization, some bullying, medical discrimination.

I wasn't diagnosed as Autistic until I was in my thirties. I was always a bit different than other children (okay, a wee bit more than a bit). I spent much of my "social" time with others in awkwardness and misunderstanding. I preferred to be alone. I was highly sensitive to light, sound, touch and scents. I had this capacity for feeling far too much and was often told I was too sensitive and that I needed to toughen up. I was ridiculed and teased, bullied and beaten up frequently for being different. I didn't have many friends. I had neighborhood "friends" who I played with during the weekends and after school at times but they never socialized with me at school. Much of the time I spent watching them play and listening to them talk. I would play next to people not necessarily with them. 

I didn't have a good friend until third grade. She was different too. She was not one of the popular kids and she was often ridiculed and teased as well. We were fringe kids. We didn't participate with the majority of the groups and never fit into any cliques. We bonded over our "differentnesses". 

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